I think churches sometimes forget that we no longer live in a "real world." We live in a virtual world, and while yes, it gives us a great advantage, it also comes with a true need for discernment and de-idolization.

Now first, I want to be exceptionally clear; I still consider myself a "baby" Christian. I believe and I still am trying to understand all of this. It's been pretty close to 3 years since I've really started my journey seriously. I have a testimony, and I'll save that for another go. However, there's quite a few things I have had to dig through to truly understand this faith and what God wants.

In short, this isn't me preaching and leading here... just consider it a friendly list of advice to those who are now believers, and are asking "why is this so hard?" or "what do I do now?" and everything that comes along with belief. If you are on the fence, this likely won't help you, and maybe I'll write another article of what turned me from skeptical to belief.

Anyway, let me just say, welcome to the faith! Being Christian isn't easy like some folks would have you believe. It took a long while to figure half of this out and I still ain't even close to where I need to be.

Which is why this exists, so maybe you can shortcut some of my mistakes and misunderstandings.

You'll hear from any good church, influencer, or approach to the Bible that it's a relationship, not a list of do's and don'ts. Yes, while true, our view of a relationship is only known as our worldly relationships - our parents, our lovers, our friends, our pets, etc. - and each of us process those relationships differently.

However, this relationship is unique. It isn't based on a face to look at. It's about the heart (some will call it spirit, I personally like soul) connecting to something greater than ourselves. Your worldly relationships likely do reflect this though. You would easily do anything for your partner. You would drop everything to help a friend, not expecting anything in return. You'd work to make your parents proud and help them where needed.

The difference is, the Father doesn't need you... He wants you. Since He is the all knowing, all powerful creator, He doesn't require anything of you. What he wants is your safety through belief in His son Jesus, and He wants you to be His vehicle for light in the world. All for the sake of love.

Yeah yeah, you may be thinking this seems all great, but you don't understand the practically here. I constantly have the same thoughts, but I dare you to challenge it to grow your faith.

Faith is belief. Faith is trust. Belief in Jesus is trust and surrender. If you have an addiction, a problem, a situation, etc. - test your faith. Focus on God, on Jesus, on the Holy Spirit, confess your sins and learn how to repent. There's a reason it all happens, but only God knows in the moment. You have to figure it out, or just trust that He knows what He's doing.

... I know. That last paragraph was a lot of really important stuff without explanation. Let's just shoot it out real quick -

• Surrender - Admitting you are not in control, living in the moment with Jesus and having Him walk with you... not just "doing things for Jesus"
• Test your faith - Not by some scientific method, but rather let it go. Don't solve it, don't focus on breaking a bad habit, etc. - just pray, give it to Jesus, and every time you need some help or feel like controlling it, don't. Continue to pray.
• Repent - It isn't just admitting it's wrong or bad and saying sorry, and then taking some action to show it... no repentance is internal. Repentance means you understand what you're doing is wrong. You'll likely feel sorrow and grief, which should be followed by the need or desire to change, and once you change, you kind of close that loop.
• Finally, no bold words, but we aren't meant to understand the world. We're meant to live to glorify God. This doesn't mean things happen and you have to dissect it... no but rather trust that God knows what He's doing.

Know also, faith is not a transaction; it's love. Love is unconditional. Love does not desire anything in return. Love is fulfilling and peaceful. If you're out here looking for what you can get out of God... you're already not in the right heart space.

Your faith shows by your light. It's not about what you CAN produce, but what you ACTUALLY produce out of the love and glory of God. Keep that in your back pocket, I'll get back to that a little later.

The glory of God, if visible to you, would legitimately kill you. You are unworthy. No matter to God though, because He's got infinite ways to get something across to you. There's many videos, churches, books, programs, etc. that will teach you about this, but know there's a few ways you can hear Him.

The Holy spirit is your intercessor. Even in your grumbling, rambling, incessant requests, the Holy Spirit knows how to take that to Jesus. You talk to God through prayer, worship, and gratitude. Even then, I heard someone say once "if you can't hear God, who moved?" - shocker, the answer is you. That doesn't mean however that God has ever abandoned you. He's always there; waiting, watching, and caring for you. You, however, have free will, graciously given to you. You still have to make the conscious choice to listen.

"Great, so how in the world does He speak then if He can't be here in front of me?" - You have the Bible. Your guide to life. Your witness to His character. The image of what you were made from by words. I am sure you've heard that many times though. What really opens your ears though, is turning off your brain, and tuning into your soul. What the Bible does though, and what they really don't explain is feed you. The more of the Bible you intake, the more your heart tends to lean in and understand the world around you from God's perspective.

You have a billion thoughts, but there are some that you latch on to. Some that you feel and just know it's the truth. It's a demand, it's a push, it's a request. As long as you know it's not inherently evil, it's probably being given to you on purpose (knowing the Bible comes in handy here!). Act on those. You'll see just how good God really is. Sometimes it's the random person having a conversation with you and a weird need to ask a question. Sometimes it's your begging for strength

God also tends to use your soul to speak to you. You'll find certain things fulfilling, and others just feel like a "to do" list. You'll find amazing enjoyment, inspiration, and passion for some things, and others will completely deplete you. This my friend, isn't an accident; it's how we're built. The Holy Spirit within you as a believer tends to amplify this. So if you didn't believe but liked playing guitar a lot because it made you feel good, now you believe and suddenly your job feels like a field of dead grass and guitar gives you some amazing feelings... that's a voice right there my friend.

Also He listens through prayer and obedience. Your heart has been replaced with a new one, and you have the Holy Spirit. Ask and you shall receive... but that sounds transactional doesn't it? Well it's because it isn't exactly your choice; you pray to God, you ask and he is gracious. He might not answer and save you. You might ask for strength, and he gives you challenges that make you stronger. It does happen when you pray... it isn't just the world and your life. It's God, and when you believe and notice it, you can't unsee it. It's not the same, it's very different when God is at work. Also, when you obey, read, and want to learn and talk to God, He will put things on you and you need to obey. That obedience brings you closer to God.

Apologetics are a thing. A really good thing. However, it can lead you down a worldly path of knowledge seeking instead of God seeking. Then as you start searching for apologetics, you'll end up in a battlefield for Christianity online. You'll be in between videos of atheists, Islam, sometimes even different denominations of Christianity, all battling for what they believe is correct. After a while, you'll start hitting "deconstruction" videos, poor church behaviors, "you're not saved" videos, creator controversies, and all the negativity you can think of.

In the midst of all of this, you'll find confusion. Tons of it. In some cases, you won't even end up picking up the Bible, due to all the info you get from online sources. You'll doubt your faith, you'll try and understand viewpoints that don't make sense, and you'll be down rabbit holes, challenging everyone's opinion, and neck deep in research because a lot of the craziness seems valid.

Here's the thing; some of us are built to be in that battle. There's no doubt. Folks are equipped with knowledge, confidence, faith, and wisdom that allows them to fight this, dare I say spiritual warfare. The issue is that most of us aren't (myself included), and things like YouTube, social media, and online articles (such as this!) tend to lean into drama more than education.

We should, as God fearing followers of Jesus, be steadfast and equipped to do good works for the glory of our Father in Heaven... but we all aren't supposed to have swords and shields on the front lines. In war, there's plenty of other ways you can further the Kingdom without being in... spiritual violence. Maybe? You could just be citizen helping your neighbors. You might be a medic. You could be a tech. The list goes on.

For you, it's up to you to determine whether God has called you into it. I was fascinated by it, until I realized that it was hurting me and my faith more than it was helping. It was great in the beginning, using facts, knowledge, and scripture to reinforce God's truth, and not some random truth. After that though... it served it's purpose and now I just sigh at creators whose videos I loved watching.

That's okay. I still love them and what they do. It's just not where I am at. Ultimately, God wants us in relationship with Him and we do that through Jesus Christ with the help of the Holy Spirit. Everything else is a distant secondary.

First off - find a church. How do you do that? Well that all depends on where you land with your beliefs. Or just attend a bunch until one feels... welcoming, or like home, where you don't feel so outcasted, or are making connections. It isn't so much about "going to church," but rather about finding a community. It doesn't have to be your best friends or anything, but somewhere you feel safe. Communities, whether best friends or not, is essential, and honestly I can't speak much to it, because I've been isolated so long that the only thing I know is that I need it. Without it I have no accountability, I have no one to share my experiences with, and since most my friends aren't Christian, I also have no one to appreciate the Lord with me. If that sounds like you, find a community. Hopefully you're better at it than I am!

Attend your church a bit, understand their values, and since you're a new Christian, start understanding your faith and the Bible a bit more. Once you've settled in, start serving at the church. Doesn't matter what you do. Music, production, offering guys, door greeters, kids ministry, volunteer work, etc. - just start serving. Here's why; Jesus example for us wasn't to come down, gather attention, and lead the world to victory... no, he came to serve. Learning to serve in a church is such a different view than what you're used to, like working a job, helping your family, etc. Instead, it's a community driven type of work that's centered around people. This opens your eyes to what serving is all about, which I like, because for me, serving was always a bit different, and my church opened up to understanding what it means to serve.

Serving is a choice made out of love. It is not "I need to feed my kids" or "you have XYZ to do by this due date." What I love about church serving is that you get to see that on full display, without the financial risks or hooks. The church basically has a central purpose that will usually sit in the realm of discipleship, experience, and prayer. Churches are not money houses. They can't afford to pay 13 production guys, a full professional band, two IT cloud gurus, pay every volunteer a "fair market wage" and compensate folks for sacrificing a few hours every week to host. Well... decent non-mega-evangelical churches can't. So the entire church does often have a few select individuals who are on "staff" and get paid often a low salary. Everyone is else is basically a volunteer... either using time, skills, or gifts to ensure the church helps those in the body of Christ.

Also in return, the Church isn't focused on some bottom dollar or number to reach (at least it shouldn't be), they are focused on the people. It's a wildly different experience from mine, especially in tech and corporate settings. When I first started serving, they caught my interest in production, specifically on the sound board. They started to put me on there, shadow, and now I've been doing it for well over a year. I am a regular. When I first started though, they had me bounce around a bit - controlling cameras one week, sound the next, lights, and when I did lights a second time, I asked the director at the time - "I know this program and everything we do here is pretty much standard. Why hasn't anyone developed guides, helpful runbooks, templates, or automation to help things go off without a hitch? You don't have to worry about a lot of these struggles." His response has stuck with me.

"Well I mean we could... but then we'd have less volunteers. We have the capabilities, but when we put someone on the light board and have them click the buttons, they feel important, and that's what really matters."

The absolute dead opposite of what we're used to in the work force and what we're taught as kids. It's not transactional; it's full of meaning and care. I don't know about prior generations, but my generation was practically raised to "transactional" and it's hard to break. To achieve your dreams you must sacrifice. You can be what you want so long as you give it all. Work is trading your time for money. Eventually that bleeds into the rest of our lives; love is what you do. It's not apology unless you're taking action. There's a list of things there, but the point is that we must give to receive - but not out of love, but because that's how the world operates.

This will help you build community, understand yourself and purpose a bit more, and really understand how life is supposed to be lived; it's not about people pleasing and hard rules, it's about serving others out of love.

One thing that's really hard for me, even today to grasp, is that you must let yourself live for God. You must condition yourself and work towards letting God illuminate you. Part of me knows what this means, and why it's true. The other, judgmental and worldly part of me... says it's selfish, and it uses Biblical examples to prove it. I tend to lean towards the Law of Moses, the examples of prophets giving everything, the example of Jesus spending his life for God... and say I am not doing enough for others.

It won't take long before you discover The Great Commission - make disciples of all nations. It feels urgent because it is. However, you can't as a new Christian just a few months or years into your walk, just start preaching, converting your coworkers, going on missions, and all that jazz and expect great success. No, that's not actually your role here. Your role is to let God live through you, and let him lead others to salvation through you.

So what does that mean? I talk to folks that seem to be constantly giving and they all have a very similar story; an idea of living with overflow. All in various formats, but the idea is the same here - that you let God fill your soul and being up to it's limits until it starts overflows, and from there, fruit is produced, God takes care of you, and light allows you to shine on others.

Here's where it gets tough though - chances are if you're new, you have a lot of refinement needed before you're full of light. You've spent some period of time living a worldly life, living by worldly laws, and have built tons of habits, identities, and methods to deal with life. You will at some point go through periods of loss, and likely many of them. And I, myself, am still being refined and I've got many things to let go of.

I do want to specify here, it's okay to grieve. It sounds weird, but I'll use myself as an example, and it's going to sound a bit ridiculous, but it proves a point. I have always loved fast cars. I can't afford sports cars and I don't have time to mod 90's cars to have 1000hp, but I would often like my cars to be small and fast. The last car I bought in 2021 was a standard sedan with 300hp, and a sports tuned engine. I loved it. It was fun, had a great sound system, and just... was fun to drive. However, my wife has a lease, and we have 2 kids. My car over the course of nearly 4 years, only had 7k miles put on it. Her SUV in the same period we put 32k miles on it. We needed something different, and I had an urge to get rid of the car. The wife kept bringing it up, I had many heavy thoughts about it. I want to be clear; I did NOT want to get rid of my car... but I did for my family, because I felt I was called to do it. It was difficult trading it in.

When it was gone, I felt a heavy sadness wash over me every time I went outside and saw my vehicle. I missed my car, but what I think God was trying to do was break an identity of "the guy who has a fast cool car." It was strange. I spent a couple of weeks being real sad about it, but I can't identity myself with cars and Jesus. It has to be only Jesus. If he's going to do it with something that simple, He will end up doing it for you too. There's a lot else I've had to let go of; one of those things is also being one of my favorite bands, has been number 1 on my list for a decade. I get convicted listening to certain albums, and I don't exactly enjoy it anymore. Again, I feel sad about it, but it's okay.

Jesus wants you to leave everything behind and follow Him. Much like the rich person who said he was to sell everything he had and didn't... yeah that's us. It just sometimes isn't with money. Maybe it's your obsession with a genre of music. Maybe it's a bad habit. Maybe it's an identity. You'll hear and feel the convictions, and you should follow them into freedom. The more you let go of, the more light Jesus can put in you.

So what you need to do is focus on your relationship with God. Follow Jesus, conform to His will, listen to him, let go of things, become one with Christ. When that's what you focus on, everything else becomes... meaningless, vapor, and you'll receive a light like none other, and you'll able to do God's will with ease, as natural as it comes.

To sum this up - living with light means that your life should look completely different the deeper you get into your relationship with Jesus. It should reflect joy, peace, and fulfillment. That alone, and making sure that you are giving the glory to God, is the best way all of us can attract non-believers into the world.

Okay, so this is a big one, and I actually added it after almost finishing the article. It was going to be an ending statement, but I have enough to give you that I think it deserves it's own section.

A foreword; for the sake of simplicity, for this section, I will solely focus on music, because it's often the topic you'll see discussed everywhere. Know however, that anything that is not specifically labeled as "Christian" is considered secular - from products to shows to music to anything you can apply it to. This advice may center around music, but it doesn't only apply to music.

Christian content to a lot of people is the only way to truly know that you're doing nothing wrong, you're intaking the right messages, and that it's the only way to be pure... but you might have forgotten somewhere with your brain trying to keep you safe that God made everything. These types of people will often tell you that "Taylor Swift is a witch and going to her concert is bad" or that they can't watch a music video by 50 cent because he's not a Christian artist. You shouldn't go to a party, because that's bad.

You'll also encounter the "everything not good is a demon" person. It's not an "if" but a "when." There's a lot of them out there, and they are often some of the most hurtful people you'll meet from the Christian community. I get that their intention is good; they want to bring you closer to God, however their commentary often comes off as attacks, because they think it's some battle with a demon. You have anxiety - a typical human experience. No, these people think you have been possessed by a demon from Hell, and you need to exorcise it, but don't tell you how, or just encourage you to go to church for it. Taylor Swift, Kenny Chesney, Eminem, Lil Boozey, Rihanna - nah, they're all warlocks, witches, and Satan worshippers that aim to posses you through spells casted in their music. It's all very wild. They are often like the conspiracy crowd who believes the earth is flat and will take absolutely no proof otherwise.

The problem I have with all of it is two things really;

• Everyone's experience on this planet with God or not, is completely unique. So when you introduce God, everyone will have specific sets of convictions, gifts, and otherwise experiences that you won't have. Don't judge them, rather just love them. Learn about them.
• These mindsets, at least in my opinion, make God seem really weak. You have the Holy Spirit inside of you, God essentially, and you think a witch is going to kick the Holy Spirit out and possess you? Nah bro, my God is much more powerful than that.

Now that being said, there's a few main points I want to point out when you're thinking about this. Again, I'll focus on music because it's a common topic... but it's also what I am most familiar with in my journey.

1. You do have the Holy Spirit within you as a believer, but you also have your own spirit... which needs to fed appropriately. It lives and thrives off of love and inspiration, creation and creativity. Not just with secular music, but also with Christian music, you should be concerned with what you intake... not as in analyze everything before you listen, but rather listen and pay attention to the way you feel. A few examples - I listen to metal. Often I will look at some pretty cool album covers, but some of them... I already know I shouldn't click on because they introduce fear or skepticism. Let's say I am listening to a new album, and I really like the music, but some lyrics catch my ear and I get the urge to go look at the words, and I find they are totally against what I believe. I shouldn't intake that album. Let's even say everything passes there - I find an album that sounds awesome, lyrics are good, but I just can't help but feel uninspired, sad, or even just upset. It's the Holy Spirit telling me I should stray away from it.
2. The way you intake information is subjective. If you need proof, know that a Catholic scientist came up with the Big Bang theory, and atheists adopted it as the "this is proof of no God" theory. What this means though is the way that you process or interpret something isn't the same as other people. So you may listen to an album and feel inspiration - you feel heard, you feel like you want to make similar music, it lights you up... but your friends may listen to the same album and feel like garbage. That's okay. Things are put into our lives by God for specific reasons, because each of us as children of God have purposes beyond our knowledge to take on in God's will.
3. There is a such thing as the "human experience" - it's not as black and white as demonic and Godly. Sure, there are demonic presences and influence, and God is ever present in all things. There is also you - with a physical body, in a physical world, with a brain that's been shaped by your life experiences. Anxiety isn't a demon. Autism isn't a demon. Sickness is not a demon. These are all just part of our physical experiences as humans. Stuff happens. Don't assume bad = demonic; it doesn't.
4. If you truly trust God, put your faith in Jesus, and understand how powerful He really is, then most of this shouldn't matter to you at all. You just live, follow his guidance, and learn more about Him. God is not weak. Don't play as though the world can shake him off, overtake Him, or that they can alter and change His presence. They can't.

The determination of Christian vs Secular doesn't matter ultimately. God made everything, and no matter what we or the world attempts to use it for, God can use it for His own. God is sovereign over all. Jesus has dominion over earth. There is no exception. All you have to do is pay attention to the Holy Spirit and you're soul.

When you're constantly worried about everything in the world, you're living out of a spirit of fear. That's not what God gave you, it's not from God at all. Live with joy, peace, and happiness. Just pay attention and be in tune with the Holy Spirit. That's it.

In a world where everything is instant, your career wants things faster and faster, money and problems always so abundant, and the world keeps turning and advancing faster than you can honestly keep up with. Thus, you are going to feel like your faith needs to be the same. Pray harder, faster, more frequently, do extensive research on the Bible, immediately find the perfect community, start sharing your beliefs online, etc. etc.

Let me tell you one thing Jesus has made abundantly clear to me; God doesn't operate on the world's time. He operates on His own. You cannot foster a better faith through "advancement" and "doing the right things." In the same way you don't fall in love or build friendships in a couple of days and you know them inside and out, the Lord is infinitely more deep than any of them, so know it will take time.

I just want to reinforce this. It will take time to shape you for Christ. It will take time before you get the opportunity to be worked through. It will take time to discover what role you play in God's will. It will take time to start hearing consistently from God. It will take time to break and build habits. It will take time to learn sometimes even the basics of the Bible.

Don't take this as something defeating, but rather as way for you... the beautiful soul seeking God, to also know that you need to slow down as well. One of the things mentioned a few times in the Bible is how folks "meditated" on the Bible, God's words. Any sort of meditation you do isn't supposed to clear your mind, but rather focus it, and when you focus on something, you're taking time to ingest it. You could say, watch a video summarizing with fancy animation stuff say, the book of Ecclesiastes and get a nice idea of what it is. It doesn't however replace the impact of the actual words in the book. You can summarize Ecclesiastes in practically one sentence; everything worldly is temporary and pointless because we all end up dead, so enjoy the life that God gave you (that's a poor sentence for that book, but you get the point). That shouldn't be your only takeaway though; because the short book of wisdom is actually very deep. It's a story of how this teacher tried to live a fulfilling life by worldly means, and just nothing actually made a difference. You get to hear how material things, knowledge, wisdom, etc. didn't replace God's will, doesn't bypass happenstance, and just because we're all headed to death, doesn't mean everything is dark and pointless.

You'll notice if you slow down, today you may get through one verse, and it's a whole 10 words... but it makes you think because it stands out to you. It means something more than just a few words or a piece of advice. You start thinking about it, dwelling on it, and it tends to bring you a little more peace than you had yesterday.

Life is also the same way. Slow down. If you end up letting go of something, take a couple of weeks to sit on why, grieve over it, understand what you're doing. You likely work in some super fast paced environment, but know that even though the work is fast paced, you don't have to be. You can slow a little bit and take it in. Know that life isn't always about money and time, it's also about the beauty of it. Take a vacation. Go sit outside for 10 on the grass. Go find a really cool tree and think about how it got there, why you think it's beautiful, and thank God for the experience to behold something made by nature that's so magnificent. Take some time after you've accomplished something to feast your eyes on what God has allowed you to create, and appreciate His hand in helping you do so.

Final Thoughts

Being a Christian honestly isn't easy. Depending on where you work, and what your family situation is, it could be even harder. Christianity has grown over the years sure, but the resistance to it has also grown. We in America may not be like the apostles who literally died for their beliefs, who were executed or killed, but that doesn't mean because we're Christian we get a free pass. Belief in Jesus is divisive. There are tons of folks who will not respect you because of the cross on your shirt, because of the scripture in your social media profile, or because you mention Jesus or God every chance you get.

Even before that though... your internal world will change. You will gain more peace and joy, but you will also gain a lot of struggle, pain, and sorrow. What you know and what you're familiar with will alter, creating a lot of friction. Your mind will be cleansed, and a lot of the old comfortable, yet sinful practices you did will suddenly feel like death, and you'll be uncomfortably letting them go and changing. You'll go through phases where God will have successfully emptied you, and you'll feel it - the hopelessness, the fear, the dread. Every time you feel like it's all going good, you'll get that nudge in your brain that you haven't prayed or read your Bible in month, and you'll feel really guilty. In some cases, you may lose friends, family, community, or even what used to be considered "loves" of yours, like hobbies, cars, or otherwise material things.

This is where we are extremely lucky to live in a time where the Holy Spirit dwells within us. That conviction is the Holy Spirit guiding you. Listen to it, you'll know it, because it doesn't feel normal. You'll listen to a song and even though you're enjoying it, you'll feel that lump in your stomach. You should probably stop. You'll be having a conversation with a coworker, and you'll suddenly feel sad. You should probably shy away and get out of that conversation. Suppose you have a hobby, and suddenly that hobby feels lifeless. You should find another one. If you suddenly feel the need to pray, then pray. If you have an urge to open your Bible, do it. If you something happening and you feel an urge to help someone, help them.

All in all, Jesus gives you the comfort and peace to live in God's will, and that will be bring you all the love you'll ever need and then some. It will overflow and pour out to others. You have the Holy Spirit that helps you live without fear and guides you along the way. You can just simply live to glorify God through Jesus.

Just keep going. Keep testing and building your faith. Good luck sibling!